Mentor Advice for the First Meeting with Your Mentee
Once you’ve matched with your mentee, schedule an initial meeting to discuss your goals and expectations and understand your mentee's background and needs. The advice on this page for the first mentor/mentee meeting can help to facilitate a productive and meaningful conversation; feel free to adapt it based on your preferences and needs.
You can also download this advice in a PDF worksheet format.Advice for introductions with your mentee
Remember, the first meeting is about building rapport and establishing a foundation for your mentorship journey. It's an opportunity to get to know your mentee and for your mentee to get to know you, and to set shared expectations and goals as well as points of connection.
Introductions
When introducing yourself to your mentee, share your name and pronouns, and be sure to take note of your mentee's name and pronouns. Some example of icebreaker questions to get the conversation started are:
What is one thing you're passionate about, outside of physics? What inspired you to join the NMC?
To help you and your mentee get to know each other, you can also discuss:
- Your personal and professional background Your current roles, responsibilities, and areas of expertise
- Common interests, hobbies, or passions
If you aren’t sure where to start, here are some additional questions that you can think through before the meeting to help you share your background and experience with your mentee:
- How did you choose your career and what led you to where you are now? What support systems helped you along your career journey?
- What were some of the most challenging hurdles or biggest learning curves you’ve experienced?
- Do you have experience as a mentor? If yes, are there aspects of those mentoring relationships that worked well that we could bring into ours?
In addition to teaching your mentee about your personal journey, we encourage you to learn about your mentee's personal story as well. Here are a few ideas of questions to ask your mentee:
- What is your background, whether academic, professional, and/or personal?
- What are key or pivotal moments that have contributed to the way you think and/or approach situations?
- Why are you looking for support from a mentor?
- Have you been a mentee before? If yes, is there anything you'd like to share that did or didn't work well?
- What are your strengths?
- Where would you like to take your career and/or life? What kind of life do you imagine for yourself after earning your degree?
Communication & expectations
Discussing expectations for communication as well as your and your mentee's preferred communication methods (email, video calls, in-person meetings, etc.) is an important step in establishing the mentoring relationship.
You should also determine the frequency and duration of your interactions (e.g., bi-weekly, monthly) and clarify expectations for responsiveness and availability. As part of establishing the duration of frequency of your meetings, you should schedule recurring mentor check-in meetings. You and your mentee should also create a plan for what you will do if you cannot make a check-in meeting.
Defining goals & objectives
The mentor and mentee should discuss and set both short-term (over the next few months) and long-term goals (by the end of the academic year and beyond) for the mentoring relationship, These can include academic, personal, and career-related goals.
As a mentor, you are encouraged to ask your mentee to share specific areas where they seek guidance or support (e.g., coursework, research, career exploration). That way you can offer insights and suggestions based on your mentee's needs, and together you can brainstorm potential areas of focus for the mentorship.
Discussing challenges & concerns
The mentoring relationship works best if your mentee is honest and can openly share any anticipated challenges or concerns they might face as a marginalized or minoritized physics student. As a mentor, by understanding these challenges, you can offer strategies or advice . You should also bring up any potential conflicts of interest or limitations.
To understand some of the challenges your mentee may be facing, APS has put together a description of unique journeys experienced by students each semester.
Review Navigating Unique JourneysBuilding a supportive relationship
During your first meeting, you and your mentee should discuss ways you can both contribute to a supportive and empowering relationship. As a mentor, you should emphasize the importance of confidentiality and trust.
Agreeing on next steps, homework & action items for the next meeting
To make the most of your upcoming meetings, you and your mentee should determine action items for each of you before you next meet, as well as set a tentative schedule for future meetings. As a mentor, you should consider materials and resources that you may want to share with your mentor between meetings. You may also want to set next steps for your mentee in the form of homework, such as researching or compiling questions or topics to explore in the next meeting.
More mentor resources
View all mentor resources
Review APS's mentor resource library for NMC mentors.
Download the mentor guidelines document
Save a summary of APS's mentor guidelines and advice.
APS career resources
APS provides guidance and information for physicists at every stage of their education and careers.